easter eggs...

I love being a child still, doing dumb holiday things, like coloring eggs! :) A's niece and I colored like fifty eggs tonight and was so much fun...now I can't wait to have my own little family.

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What should have been a good day, with great plans and some priceless words, turned into the worst night...sitting at a hot bar, not drinking, alone, miserable and counting down the seconds till we could leave. But I realized that I am getting older and I am done with going out and drinking all the time, tired of the scene, tired of seeing my ex every time I go out and just tired. I think Vanessa has finally grown up and is settling down, ready to stay put somewhere, ready to have a family..and of course I'll always be me, a social drinker who loves to have fun but in moderation now.

March did not pan out as well as I'd hoped for me being productive..I literally haven't done much for the last few weeks but I think it's exactly what I needed to re-group. So now I'm ready to start April being productive and non-procrastinating (or I can try at least!)....I need to continue with my detox and need to finish this yuck semester and hopefully pass.

so me!

I was just thinking how sad technology is...I don't write in a diary, I blog; I don't take pictures and put them in a photo album, I post them on FB. I love randomly looking back at old diary entries and old pictures...so now I had to order all the pics from FB and it was expensive! ;)

So it's a crazy thought that I may have found the one and the whole time he was right there.
And before anyone yells at me for moving too fast or thinking too big already, it's just a random thought! :P I know that I have a tendency to leap into things and follow my heart, not my head but I'm okay with that. Part of my charm is that I'm so passionate about things, that I do give all my heart to people, even when they don't deserve it. This is a completely different relationship then I've ever had before, I'm thinking before I act, I actually talk to him instead of running away, I 100% believe that he knows me and doesn't care how crazy I am, and for the big things, like sex and love and marriage, I am being very cautious and slow with. I would like to do this one right, wait to have sex till I'm engaged, wait to say I love you until we know 100% this is the one....
Honestly, I'm not over-thinking and analyzing it, just enjoying how great this feels and happy I am. Really I'm just enjoying that out of a sea of shitty, unreliable people I have found a genuine friend.