plans.....

I was once told, if you want to make God laugh, make plans. I think it's very true but I am a planner, controller by nature so I'm going to attempt to make plans for the next two years. Here goes....I will graduate in May 2012 and then am planning on moving, as much as I have enjoyed being back in LC I know with certainty I want more. So I am in favor of two places, Seattle/Portland area or back to Colorado. If I go to Colorado, I have been admitted to a Pastry School and will do a program that is part time for 15 weeks and then get my second degree. This way I can teach for awhile and then eventually do my biggest goal, which is to open a bakery.

Well I'm doing what I do best and freaking out, the difference is I'm actually talking to him and friends before acting. I tell him to remind me to breathe and he does and then I calm down.
I'm scared that I don't know how to let myself be happy...

Oh and we completely remind me of Charlotte and Harry from Sex and the City...he was so not her type and she almost wrote him off but it turned out he was perfect for her and the love of her life.

♥

It's way to early to say and I'm the biggest skeptic of love and people and forever, but this relationship, this guy feels real, different. I can't stop thinking about him, miss him after a minute, get very grouchy when I can't have him, completely trust him, and for the first time in my life feel 1000% positive that no matter what I do, how much of pain I am, how much of my Vanessa bs I do, he won't leave me. I feel like he knows me completely. He told me today, "You are not a pain, just want a lot."
It's crazy...
Is this what it feels like when you find the one??

“You know you're in love when you can't fall asleep because reality is finally better than your dreams.”
- Dr Suess

♥

I am in fact a little smitten....it's a great, scary feeling!

I am having a Alice in Wonderland theme party in April and so excited, I LOVE dressing up but am having costume issues...however I think this will be the one.
http://www.starcostumes.com/items/Queen-of-Hearts-Costume-Adult.aspx?utm_source=googlebase&utm_medium=comparisonshopping&source=k232270
And on a side note, it never ceases to amaze me how easily things change in our lives, how much they constantly change...but all I can do is enjoy the roller coaster ride. Right now I'm on a high point. ;) It is crazy how some people can be in your lives forever, yet you never really pay them attention until one day, through dumb FB, you start talking and they become a huge part of your life....love it!!

currently reading...

I am now starting Wicked by Gregory Maguire. I can't wait...loving the whole play on The Wizard of Oz (oh and the book is green, which I just think is cool!).

boy update...

So I have finally decided to take my lovely friends advice and never go back or entertain thoughts of ex's....I had a momentary lapse this week with G, especially after the things he said Sunday...but there is a reason why ex's are ex's!
I am starting to talk to a new boy, who is not my type-but honestly do I even know what my type is anymore!-but very sweet, sincere, funny and clearly adores me. I am not putting much into it at this point but just seeing what happens....but he is surprising me and it's lovely! :)

“When one door closes, another opens; but we often look so long and so regretfully upon the closed door that we do not see the one which has opened for us.”